They say that life begins at 40 but, for some, so does unexpected parenthood…
At 41, singing superstar Madonna gave birth to her second child in September 2000 by her British husband, Guy Ritchie. Meanwhile, sultry model Iman, David Bowie’s wife, gave birth in August 2000 at the age of 44, and Cherie Blair’s much publicised surprise pregnancy came at the age of 45.
Of course, they are not the first famous mums to have had children later in life. Model
Jerry Hall, and actresses Jane Seymour, Emma Thompson, Patricia Hodge
and Fiona Fullerton have all followed that path.
Many more women are now prepared to take the plunge after 35. Risk of a baby having Down’s syndrome is one in 100 if the mother is 40, compared with just one in 2,000 at the age of 20.
Dr Julia Berryman, senior lecturer in psychology at Leicester University, who has
carried out extensive parenting studies, says that too much is made of the dangers of late
motherhood and that the odds of having a Down’s syndrome child are still pretty slim at
the age of 40.
It’s a sentiment many women seem to be following. The number of women over 40 having
babies in the UK has doubled in the last 10 years and now stands at more than two per
cent. Furthermore, government figures (1998) show that nearly 15 per cent of babies are
born to women age 35-plus in this country – that’s one in seven babies – and the
average age of mothers in this country is 28.9, a figure which has been creeping up for 40
years.
Do older mums make better mums?
“On the whole, babies are more likely to be planned and wanted by women in their
thirties,” says Dr Berryman, co-author of Older Mothers: Conception, Pregnancy
and Birth After 35 (Pandora). “There is evidence that older women express
greater satisfaction and feel they are ready to have a child because they have been
fulfilled in their lives before that time,” she says. “The notion of sacrifice
is more often talked about in younger mothers. Older mothers may want to spend more time
with their children.”
“Older mothers will often have financial security and in many cases a longer and
more stable relationship and the ability to take time out of a career that is planned with
the possibility of returning to that career later on,” says developmental
psychologist Dr Charlie Lewis. Studies have shown that children of older mothers tend to
do better on ability tests, while older mums are likely to be more highly educated and of
a higher social class than younger ones.
Research shows that older women are also more likely to breastfeed, says Dr Berryman,
which indicates they may have a different attitude from younger mums, while younger women
may be slightly more at risk of postnatal depression.
Giving birth later is less risk-prone for women who already have children, as in
Madonna, Iman and Mrs Blair’s case. But Dr Lewis points out: “The disadvantages are
increased fatigue in older mothers and problems with conceiving in the first place.”
Older mums should remember that, when their child is 10, they are likely to be in their
late forties or early fifties and that they may well be paying for their child’s further
education into their pensionable years, when some might prefer to be sitting back and
enjoying their retirement.
Another problem with being an older mum is the issue of peer groups, says Dr Lewis.
“Studies of adult friendships show that the people you maintain close friendships
with are the ones who you go through pregnancy and early parenting with. When you are in
your early forties and mixing with people in their mid-twenties, you sometimes miss out as
you may have less in common.
“Parenting is something that succeeds or fails depending on how well you are
supported by those around you and how well you support them. Sometimes it can be a lonely
experience for older mothers.”
Where to next?
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joys on our older parents discussion forum -
What are your views on older parenting? Have your say
on our general pregnancy or new parents discussion board
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