Although it is impossible to know ahead what sort of a birth you will have, it is worth thinking about some of the options you might face in labour. You can make some decisions in advance about what you want to do during labour, and how you want to be cared for. Making a plan will help you consider what factors will make this birth an enriching and positive experience for you and your partner. It can also help you think about other eventualities and what you would want if, for instance, your pregnancy went well beyond your due date, or you needed a caesarean delivery.
When should you make it?
You probably won’t want to write it all in one go. It is as you learn more about birth – through antenatal classes, books, or through talking to other mothers – that you get a feeling for what is important to you. You may find it helpful to talk through your ideas with your midwife. In some areas women are offered a page on their medical notes to write out their birth plan.
Who do you give it to?
You may not want to give it to anybody. Many couples find that simply making a birth plan is the important part of the process. Having talked through the options and possibilities, you may feel that you are both much clearer in your own minds and can simply talk things through with your carers at the time. On the other hand, you may decide to give it
to your midwife when you have an antenatal check, or your obstetrician if you are receiving specialist care. It can be helpful to talk over your wishes with them, as well as giving them the a copy of the written plan beforehand, but you may just want to give it the midwife when you’re in labour
Can you have anything you want?
Sometimes this is just not possible. For instance, if you’re planning a hospital birth, there may not be a birthing pool in your hospital, or another woman may be using it when you want it. However, if there is a medical intervention or drug that you are sure you want to avoid, that wish should be respected. Discuss this with your midwife, and find out what is usually done in your area. You’ll find it helpful to keep an open mind on what will happen and what help you may need. The course of labour may turn out to be very different from your expectations, and your birth plan needs to reflect this.
What can you include in a birth plan?
Don’t feel your birth plan has to include everything or go on for page after page.
You can just put a few headlines or bullet points down on paper to give your midwife an idea of what you are interested in. For example: ‘I would like to use self-help techniques like massage, water, breathing and relaxation as much as possible.’ Or: ‘I’m really worried about pain and think I will need a lot of help to cope with it.’
It will help your carers, and you, if your birth plan is clear and concise. It also needs to be carefully worded. It should not just be a list of demands – it is your chance to explain briefly and clearly what matters to you. It should also recognise that labour may not turn out exactly as you expect or hope.
It’s a difficult combination to achieve but it will be easier if you:
- Jot down notes for your plan over several weeks
- Talk to your midwife, antenatal teacher, other women and new mothers about labour
- Discuss it all in depth with your partner
- Write a few drafts
- Get a friend or your antenatal teacher to read the drafts and comment on them, or ask the advice of others on your babyworld antenatal club
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